When I walk to the end of each room, or by the time I walk into the next, I must take an even amount of steps. It must always be equivalent to the steps taken while retracing my path. Get up from my ottoman to go to the bathroom, 12 steps. Once in the bathroom, I take two steps to get to the toilet, and two to the sink. I wash my hands four times. I go back two steps to the toilet, and two steps back to the door. Once I exit the bathroom, I take 12 steps back to my ottoman.
In my ottoman I stare out the window. I've developed a habit of clenching my teeth in a distinct rhythm, often intersected by tapping my tongue to the roof of my mouth.
It took eight steps to get here to my laptop to write this. Before that, I took 16 steps to my bathroom sink to wash my hands four times. I wash four times now. My hands have taken to a reddish/purple color, complete with chapped skin. They used to be splotchy and dry. Now they do not appear to match the skin on the rest of my body. I'd always wash my hands in the morning, before and after meals, after using the toilet, midday, and before bed. About 6 times a day. That's now 24 times a day, plus four or eight more. I just wash my hands more now.
After not showering for a few days, I shower twice a day. Once in the morning, once at night. I eat a meal a day, usually around noon.I finally sleep more, but not enough.
My microwave just beeped. that's 16 steps to get my frozen chicken pot pie. First meal since yesterday afternoon.
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