Twinkies, Yoga, and other updates

It's been a while, bloggers... readers... followers...

The past few weeks have been a bit hectic for me with grading midterms, papers, posting online lectures and discussions.  I spent most of the University's week off grading and doing some spring cleaning. I've also been looking into hiring a new grocer because Sue has been bringing her eight year-old son on her trips to the store and then my apartment, and the little bugger is rambunctious. He doesn't understand my rules, so last week when Sue came to deliver my groceries, he charged through my apartment with muddy sneakers, whining about how he wanted something to drink and proceeded to knock over a lamp, break the bulb...the whole thing was just a mess. Sue was very apologetic of course, but I was so overwhelmed with anxiety and frustration I couldn't deal with her.
She's just hasn't been as mindful lately, either. She keeps messing up my groceries. She'll buy me marinara sauce with mushrooms, which I dislike terribly. Or she'll get the diet iced tea, which never tastes as good as non-diet iced tea. I had a hankering for chocolate cake last week and when the store's bakery didn't have any, she bought Twinkies because she thought TWINKIES were a good substitute for chocolate cake.Then the other week she dropped her purse in my entry hall, and her cheap drug store perfume bottle cracked and leaked through her purse all over my hall. I had to open the windows and ventilate the place for days, as well as clean the floor several times. Between that incident and the one with her son, I went through three clorox sprays and four boxes of wipes to clean up their messes.

I may just have to find someone a little more cautious and orderly, is all.

I also took up yoga during the spring break. I sat on Amazon for hours researching and reading reviews for various DVDs and programs...people write the strangest things for product reviews. I read about how yoga helped a mother of three strengthen her "birthing canal" and she was just raving about it. She didn't stop there though, she went on to get much more intimate about all the details and it was...well, needless to say, I didn't opt for the program she was reviewing.

But I found a pretty great one and it's really helped to bring some relaxation into my life. My cousin Bethany insisted I take it up. She lives in California where she's a yoga instructor as well as real estate agent. We Skype and/or email about once a week. I was very close to her and her brother Tom growing up. Tom is currently abroad in London, so talking to him can be a bit more difficult. But we Skype and email as well.

Anyway, being my family and all, they are very understanding and sympathetic of my situation. Though I can tell they get frustrated with me, and think I should Just get over my OCD. If it were so easy to do, I just would. But it's not.

Well. I've had breakfast, read the newspaper, and now it's time for a run on the treadmill. I save yoga for the end of the day to release the stress of cleaning and fussing all day.

Until next time,

Marty

Monday Musings

My busy weeks are almost over. Spring break is coming up and I'll have a temporary hiatus from grading. Though I teach history online, it's still a busy, demanding gig. I've been up to my ears in papers, quizzes, and formulating midterms...especially since I put off some of it in order to do my research, tend to my finally fixed ceiling...or just read, watch Fraiser, play solitaire, now blogging. Last night I got particularly caught up watching the Oscars. It's a bit silly, really. I hardly keep up with movies, so I'm not sure what I was watching it for; it's not as if I were rooting for any film or actor in particular.The only movie I saw that was up for any nominations was Terrence Malick's The Tree of Life and Woody Allen's Midnight in Paris. Both were good films. I liked Midnight in Paris much better. I found the portrayal of Hemingway, Dali, Picasso...all the historical characters, very amusing.
Last year's ceremony was great. The King's Speech won "best picture." The King's Speech is a terrific film. I don't love it just because I'm a history buff. It's a genuinely well-done movie with a great cast, cinematogoraphy, soundtrack...I could just go on and on. What I will do is post my favorite track from the film:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=LBQvhKkG1x8


I like to play this song while "cooking" and/or eating. I bet this makes me seem like a freak who finds grandeur in mundane tasks, or like a pretentious snob...but keep in mind I mainly eat frozen dinners, jarred pasta, and low-key chicken dishes. Alone in my apartment. If I could get over my OCD, I think I actually would host dinner parties and invite my colleagues I admire most. Or old friends from university. Until then, if I ever overcome it, I eat processed foods with the company of my television or a novel. Which doesn't strike me as being particularly pretentious.

This was a refreshing break from reading student's research on the boom of industrialization. Unfortunately, however, I must get back to it.

Week of the leak continued

This past week was a nightmare. However, the leak is finally fixed.

Turns out the source of the leak was the radiator in my neighbor's apartment directly above mine. Old piece of garbage. Anyway, for whatever reason their radiator began to leak, and it went on for so long, and got so bad, it soaked through the flooring and leaked through my bedroom ceiling. After calling the building's maintenance guy, Doug, last Monday, the dud finally showed up on Wednesday to check it out. I live in a pretty reputable apartment in a decent part of Chicago...I was stunned our maintenance was so slow to address this. However, once he showed up, he checked out my ceiling and declared much of it will have to be replaced since the water damage was so bad. I wanted to shriek. He went on to tell me how he'll have to break through the ceiling...causing me to clear out my once perfect bedroom and make due with sleeping in the living room for the next few days. This is just one of the many horrors this leak has bestowed upon me.

In addition to evacuating my room and transforming my living room...I had to let Dough and his team of carpenters into my apartment. I never even let SUE, my grocer, set foot in this place. It was horrible, it really was. I couldn't sleep the night before they came in. I shook and sweat in my bed (the pullout sofa) all night, on the verge of tears. The fortunate thing, however, is that this exhausted me so much that by the time Doug and the guys showed up, I was a little less anxious about the whole thing. I had been dreading this day for nearly a week.

Each day they came to break through and reconstruct the ceiling, it got a bit easier to deal with having outsiders in my place. Of course once they left around evening everyday, I immediately vacuumed, scrubbed, and disinfected the path of flooring they walked on to get to my bedroom.I so badly wanted them to wear plastic bagging on their feet, but knew better not to ask. Not only is it seen as a ridiculous request by most, but I guess it would have been a safety hazard with them standing on the ladder and all.

...wait, I smell something burning...DAMNIT it must be my Stouffer's lasagna! 

To be continued...

Marty

Week of the leak

Between my work and the leak that is taking over my bedroom, I've had little energy for blogging. Though it probably would have helped me vent about the whole situation and the stress it's causing me...So sorry, followers. If there are any of you faithful ones out there.

Anyway, I'm pretty beside myself right now. Either a pipe in the ceiling is broken or my neighbors upstairs are doing something to cause the leak. It's just unsanitary. The part of the ceiling where it is coming from is damp and appears to be buckling a bit. The constant sound of the dripping is extremely irritating. I called the building's maintenance, but they STILL haven't been able to come over. I've begun to box all my belongings in my bedroom and move them out into the other rooms. I've packed up all my bedding and moved it into the office. As for the bed, I've covered it in a plastic contraption I made out of my mattress cover, unused garbage bags, and other plastic bags I've saved and disinfected.  I'm now sleeping in the living room on my pullout sofa.  It's been a disaster. An unnecessary, unnatural disaster. 

Not much has happened since my last post. The highlight of my week has been the visit by my grocer, Sue. I have a fixed list she takes to the grocery store weekly, and she picks up everything on it. Despite how friendly I am with her, I don't think she has quite...taken to me. She's always nice, but in an almost in a reserved, nervous way. Maybe it's because I don't let her in past the entry hall of my apartment. I just have her ring my bell, place the groceries outside my door, or in the entry hall. She quickly steps back out the door frame, and shifts around as I attempt to make conversation with her. I do want to talk to her, I just don't want her in my apartment. I don't want her dirty sneakers on my just-cleaned wooden flooring. I don't want to ask her to put plastic bags over her shoes and then use hand sanitizer in order to come in my apartment, either. So I just have her stay outside or in the entry hall.

I guess that's why she isn't comfortable with me...but I try. I ask her about how she's doing as I hand her a generous tip. After she darts her eyes side-to-side and says "fine" with a stiff smile in which she curls her lips tightly so they hardly show, I bring up something I read in the news earlier that morning. Usually local stuff. She makes a few comments about it if she's up to date on the news. If not, she let's me inform her for a minute before she gives me a pitiful smile and says "see you next week" before quickly walking down the hall to the elevator. Sue is one of the few people I interact with face-to-face..seeing as this is the extent of our exchanges...well...it doesn't leave me feeling much better, or less lonely.

But I then gather my bags, bring them to the kitchen, and empty the contents on a plastic covering I have prepared for the kitchen floor earlier that morning, knowing the packaging and food from the grocery store is not yet safe for my place. After everything is laid out, I take out my disinfectant wipes and wipe off the food's packaging with them. I use the wipes on cardboard boxes and plastic bags...which most of my food is packaged in. So once that's done I take off my rubber gloves and put the disinfected groceries away.My groceries mainly consist of frozen meals, snacks like chips and crackers, pasta and sauce from a jar, milk, orange juice, grape juice, family-sized package of paper towels, cinnamon raisin bagels, earl grey tea...and butter and cream cheese when I run out. Then of course Sue picks up my toiletries such as razors, anti-bacterial liquid soap, family- sized package of toilet paper, toothbrushes, shaving cream...and shampoo and toothpaste once a month. These are the things that sustain me pretty well here in my apartment everyday. 

My kettle of boiling water has finally begun to hiss. It's time for my nightly tea accompanied by some reading. 

Goodnight,

Marty

Reacquainting myself with the outside world.

I spend all day in my apartment and rarely have any visitors. For a while it was perfect. There's no one to track in mud, germs, knock my belongings out of their designated places. No one questions how I spend most of my time sweeping my apartment's surfaces, as well as my body, with anti-bacterial spray, wipes, and sanitizers. I can comfortably tend to my raw, chapped hands after a days worth of cleaning with out the embarrassment of having to explain why. I can shower after every time I use the toilet with out the harassment of someone telling me how wasteful and pathetic it is. But after years of this kind of life, these little things no longer comfort or please me. They merely satisfy me. I miss living life like a normal person. I miss the company of others without the anxiety of how they interfere with my orderliness and cleanliness.

If not for the Internet, I would be completely alone. But I occasionally email with old friends, classmates, ex-coworkers, distant relatives. I read every section of the news everyday; I keep up with the rest of you. Now I have this blog, for those who care to keep up with me. Whoever finds this and sticks around to follow...I suppose I'm grateful. As well as pretty sorry for you.

Well...it's almost dinner time and my five o'clock shadow has officially made its unsightly appearance. I can no longer rest my chin on my hand, I loathe the feeling so much. It's time to shave and pre-heat the oven for my frozen chicken pot pie dinner. Unfortunately it's all I have until my grocery shopper returns for her weekly visit, which isn't until three days from now. At least I rarely work up an appetite.

Until next time,

Marty